Anyone who lives in New York City knows that you would rather stab yourself in the eye with a dirty water dog than visit Times Square on a Saturday, but when you have kids with you on the weekends in this city, it can be hard to avoid such tourist traps. New York City, a city with a reputation for having it all, is not as kid-friendly as one may think. At times, it may seem like the only "PG" things you can do are those activities that appear on every "fun things to do in NYC" list targeted to tourists.
My husband T and I lived in separate apartments when we first started dating. I was in the city and he was 45 minutes outside. After enduring the back and forth and many episodes of realizing that the shoes I needed for my outfit were at his apartment and not mine, T finally moved to Manhattan and his kids came to visit every other weekend. It was at that time that the kids officially became locals or at least part-time Manhattanites. The funniest thing about acclimating country mice to city living is seeing things through the eyes of the newbies and kids are no exception. They were around nine when my husband moved. We had to teach them etiquette they never thought they would have to learn - how to behave on public transportation, what not to say when someone bumps into you, how to avoid stepping into deceiving puddles (you know the ones that look like they are shallow, but are 20 feet deep). The fundamentals. As the backdrop to these conversations, we discussed the pride they should feel about being a local and not a tourist in the greatest city on earth. You could imagine our surprise when on the first night, we went to Patsy's for dinner and the questions we did not anticipate started flying. "Why are all those people outside smoking?", "Why did I see a girl still in her party clothes this morning", "Do people just go to bars all the time when they are older?" And finally, "Can we go to Times Square tomorrow?" I knew I had answers to three of the four questions, but the last one...ummmmm. Hadn't we encouraged them to push any thought of wearing "I love NY" paraphernalia out of their minds? Hadn't we espoused the virtues of understanding the grid system and the subway lines like a local? Not the tourist crossroads of the world!..Noooooo!
After cursing Carson Daley and every school administrator who decided the school field trip would be to Times Square, I reluctantly agreed to go for a short time and the next morning, we were off. When we arrived, the kids, of course were thrilled and love, love, love Times Square. The lights, the people, the M&M store! Meanwhile, all I was thinking behind my fake smile was about the grime, the fact that there could be a bomber in the vicinity, my love hate relationship with the smell of Nuts for Nuts and of course, about tourists - lots of them. Which translates to many people in bad shirts who have forgotten how to put one foot in front of the other. Little did I know that that day was the first stop of our NYC tour schedule that would last for years.
After the first trip to Times Square, I realized that although the kids lived 40 miles outside of Manhattan and had been here a handful of times before, they had not really seen what NYC had to offer because they never lived here. And maybe, despite living here for fifteen years, I had not really seen it either or at least not through the eyes of children.
From age 9-14, we toured everything from the battery to Harlem. The kids saw the rollerskaters in Central Park, the stables, played chess on a stone table, walked up and down Orchard street on a Sunday, toured every museum, Ellis island, DUMBO Arts festival and street fairs. You name it, we likely did it. It really made me and the kids appreciate my city more and I felt like I was actually living more than I ever have. It is easy to stay in and veg on the weekends or to go where you know, but the kids were forcing me to go DO something, to take advantage of every day and to try new things. Sometimes it takes kids' spirit to remind you to go out and experience things, even if tourists will be present. To skip a bottomless brunch and take in an afternoon concert. To trade in a noon wake-up for a walk to Brooklyn. To refrain from defaulting to lunch at your local and taking the subway to that cool spot in Queens that was in NY Magazine.
I am so happy to have had that time with them there when they were young enough to want to explore, but old enough to last a hard day of pounding the pavement of the city that never sleeps. NYC is now something that reminds them of me, my first small apartment in Murray Hill and all I have taught them about how NOT to act like a tourist in NYC. So take advantage of the time with the kids and do things you thought you hated. How they see it may just have you saying that the tourist traps of your fine city are "not that bad".